Dear Granddaddy, how do I get my boy to listen to me?
Yarelis S. – frustrated mom.
I’m listening to you, Yarelis. I hear you loud and clear, but, unlike your boy, I’m a grown man. I’m pretty sure, however, I’m pretty sure that when I was still just a boy, my mom thought that I wasn’t listening to her either. Truth be told, I really was listening. As a matter of fact, I can still hear the things she told me ringing in my ears today as clearly as the day she said them. I can also still see her in my mind’s eye telling me things that have helped guide me through life’s minefields.
You see, Yarelis, there is an interesting dynamic that comes into play when people spend a lot of time together, such as in a family setting. It involves pretending that we’re not listening to each other. Does this sound familiar? The other side of this unique family dynamic is that teen boys often think that their mothers can read their minds, so they must also already know that their children are listening, even when it seems that they are not.
Here’s the deal: you cannot give up on communicating with your son because you think he’s not listening. You are the most important person in his life! Whether he acts like it or not, it’s true! Your words will have a lasting impact on him. Trust me on this one. I used to be one of those boys, even if I’d rather not admit it. If she were still around today, my mom would be proud of me and of her effectiveness of her influence. It has lasted way beyond her lifetime.
Hang in there Yarelis. You’re doing a lot of good, even if you can’t see the fruits of your labor at the moment. Keep talking to your son. Then, take a deep, calming relaxation breath and do it all over again. Talk to him some more. Trust me, you’re having a strong influence on the type of man he’ll grow up to be…
Dan Blanchard is an award-winning author, speaker, and educator who has appeared on over 100 television and radio shows. To find out more about Dan or to submit a question to him, please visit him on his website at: www.GranddaddysSecrets.com .